Many years ago, before the creation of Earth, there existed a realm split asunder. On one world reined the Angels, a noble race both holy and benevolent. On the other reined the Demons, a race known for its wickedness and cruelty. The worlds were at peace with each other as long as they we separated on different planets. But as fate forced the worlds to merge. The planets collided into each other forming one.
With this new planet came two things. War, and a race not quite Angel, and not quite Demon. This new race was called Humans. Though the humans lacked magical abilities they certainly made up for with their ingenuity. They were able to make weapons from the planet we now know as Earth. These weapons held great power. The Humans grew tired of the war between the immortals. A powerful human named Hephaestus forged a weapon with more strength than both of the immortal rulers. He used the sword to send all the immortals to the realm of the afterlife. Thus the sword was name the Sword of the Afterlife. Hephaestus was thought to be a god amongst his fellow humans. He brought peace to Earth.
Though the story of Demons and Angels isn't completely at an end. While they lived on Earth the immortals had the chance to spread their seed into mortal women. Crossbreeds were made. Those of Angelic decent were known as Angelics and those of Demon decent were known as Demonics. Rather simple. The half-breeds possessed all the power of their immortal ancestors but limited life, though that life is nearly 10x that of a normal human.
Our story starts with an inevitability. Sooner or later an Angelic and a Demonic were going to mate, and what was created was far more powerful than the likes of Earth have ever seen. In this particular case two of them were born, twins. One good, and one Evil.














Devious Comments
I'd like to read the rest
So a
Keep them coming!
Ps,
quite alot of spelling errors. Just to mention it ^^
--
"orly?" "ya rly."
,___, ,___,
[O.o] [¬.¬]
/)__) /)__)
-"--"--"--"-
That being said, the idea is kinda cliché (though I’m not one to talk, my own story is so cliché it hurts me), but that defiantly doesn’t mean it can’t be good. I’m really curious to see how you’re going to handle your idea and form the narrative!
Your style so far seems to be sort of an informal, non-flower approach to the story, which is pretty good. I really like the simplicity of it, since I’ve read quite a bit of work (once again … mine included at times) that tries to make up for a weaker story line with bigger words. You’re writing seems to have confidence in itself … if that makes sense.
Humm … hopefully that all wasn’t too flaky or whatever … it did say advanced critique encouraged.
And if I said anything to which you took offense, I’m very sorry! No offense was intended!
--
As always, I dedicate my work to Zoe L, who though she may not know it has kept me going and kept me writing for a long time. Hopefully one of these days you'll get to read this dedication in a real book.
--
make me a sandwich.
--
make me a sandwich.
--
As always, I dedicate my work to Zoe L, who though she may not know it has kept me going and kept me writing for a long time. Hopefully one of these days you'll get to read this dedication in a real book.
--
make me a sandwich.
Previous PageNext Page